30 September 2011

Who is The Chicken Man?

I am such a good graduate student. I stay in and do homework late into Friday evenings (this is not the norm. I just have a super busy weekend ahead of me), and what happens when I look out my window for just a split-second?

Why, I spot the strangest vehicle I've ever seen driving down the road, of course!

It looked like a huge glass box on wheels and inside of this transparent cube was something. I couldn't really tell what it was because I was shocked and the box was far away and getting further away by the second, but I thought I saw someone inside. What I did see for certain was a big digital banner running along the outside of this moving glass house that read 617chicken.

617chicken?

I immediately recognized 617 as a Massachusetts area code and then realized that the word 'chicken' is consisted of seven letters. It wasn't 617chicken. It was (617) CHI-CKEN or (617) 244-2536! It was a phone number!

I thought that maybe this was a type of food truck that sells delicious chicken dishes and, having cash for once, I immediately called in the hopes of purchasing some sort of food from this mobile spectacle. Disappointment struck when I got an answering machine telling me that I had reached "the chicken man" and to "leave a message" so he could "get back".

I hung up.

Then I googled.

What I found was not informative whatsoever. There is a website (617chicken.com), but the links it provided did not explain a single thing. I checked the guy's Twitter account and found no enlightening information. The Facebook account was also a bust.

Who is the chicken man? Why is he driving around in a glass box? Are his websites and fan pages and twitter accounts in desperate need of updating or are they purposefully cryptic? Stay tuned!

Same chicken time! Same chicken channel!

I'm going to get to the bottom of this.

29 September 2011

Day of Oddities

I had a very strange day earlier this week. I kept crossing paths with unusual people, reading shocking things, and coming across strange occurrences that had no plausible explanations. Here's the run down.

I got off a bus at Harvard Square. I began walking down the sidewalk to the T (AKA the subway) entrance when a thin, older man rolled up to the curb on a bike and stopped. He had a long white beard and wore cut-off jeans and an open jean vest over his bare chest. Not paying this man much attention, I kept walking. Then the man began yelling. "I am tired of being stopped by Harvard police! I do not want to be stopped by Harvard police! I do not respect your establishment!" I turned around and saw the man yelling at a large gate that led into Harvard campus. He kept yelling about he did not respect Harvard or their police force. I wanted to yell back that we, meaning the general public, did not appreciate or respect raging hippies. Sadly, my fear of being stabbed with a crack pipe kept me from voicing my rebuttal.

After getting off the T, I emerged from the underground. A woman was walking in front of me and we passed by two men who were sitting on the ground next to a fountain. One was playing a guitar but both of them were singing what sounded like improvised lyrics. One of them, the dirtier and uglier and non-guitar-playing one, leaned forward as the woman in front me walked by. He looked at her and told her she was beautiful and asked for her number. The woman didn't pay him any attention but I wanted to kick that S.O.B in the teeth.

Later, I was reading The New York Times in the library and found two articles that were very interesting, yet odd, nonetheless :

Article 1 : Circumcision is believed to reduce the risk of males contracting HIV by 60%. There is a huge effort in Africa for widespread circumcision of adult males to help with their HIV and AIDS problems. One way activists hope to do accomplish their goals of foreskin removal is via an inexpensive and simple medical device. This device is a rubber ring that is locked around the penis and pinches the foreskin so that it will eventually die and fall off. The article said it was relatively painless process, and I agree that reducing the spread of HIV and AIDS is important. But, boy, I have never been more thankful for my parents taking care of that for me when I was a baby. Watching a watch part of my penis slowly die, wither and dry out, and then fall off does not sound fun at all.

Article 2 : One major health issue in Africa is the improper disposal of human waste. If it is not disposed of properly, it can leak into water supplies or even be tracked around and find its way into human food, causing illness. To help combat this, one company has issued the PoopPee bag. Yep. You guessed it. These are baggies that people are supposed to poop and pee into. The best part though, is how the bag is lined with a certain chemical that turns the human waste into fertilizer! These bags, after being filled, are supposed to be tied shut and then mailed to the company which will then give them to PoopPee bag sellers who go door to door selling this "fertilizer". While this may help alleviate some health problems, I have no idea how this is a socially acceptable solution.

After reading all about home procedures for adult male circumcision and the usefulness of PoopPee bags, I went into the bathroom. I approached the urinal and found the floor surrounding it shimmering with urine. My mind was boggled. Missing the urinal is simply not an option. You piratically stand over the dumb thing! That much pee on the floor had to have been intentional. Perhaps, the culprit was angry about the fines the library charged him and exacted his revenge in their bathroom. That, or someone tried to use a PoopPee bag but it didn't work out so well.

Later that day, I was in the Boston Common when I spotted a shirtless, older man up ahead of me. He was just standing. And then he took a step forward, stumbled, and then fell backwards in the most graceful and amusing way I have ever seen. He stuck his arms out and one leg out and kind of sat down with a slight roll onto his back. It almost looked intentional, like modern dance or something. But then, as he sat on the ground, he put a tiny plastic cup behind him and tried to lean against it for support as if it were the back of a chair. Then he just got up and walked away, looking around and mumbling to no one in particular.

It was an odd day. I checked to see if there was a full moon. There wasn't. Apparently, this is common in larger East Coast cities. I am totally fine with that.

26 September 2011

Like a Girlfriend

For those of you who have been in official (Facebook or otherwise) relationships, you have probably experienced what I am about to describe. In the beginning of a relationship, the two involved parties become inseparable. They just can't get enough of each other. And while they may fulfill their individual and necessary responsibilities, they are prone to procrastinate such things as homework or chores in exchange of spending more time in each others' presence. They stay up late and get little sleep and are exhausted for days on end, but they regret nothing and it is all worth it.

Do you know that feeling? I hope you do.

One of my roommates has recently begun a new relationship and is experiencing such things. My best friend has also just started seeing someone and I suspect she will also fall into this scenario as well. I have also found myself entrapped in this time-consuming phenomena. Only, I don't have a girlfriend. I have an addiction to the hit reality series, Big Brother.

I am obsessed with this show and will soon apply to be a contestant. To prepare myself for the competition, I have embarked on a strict Big Brother regime. I have decided to study all 13 seasons to learn the ins and outs like the back of my hand, to analyze strategies and see what worked and what didn't, to understand every aspect of this show so I can win if I am one of the lucky few who are selected to compete next summer.

This means that I have been watching a lot of Big Brother lately. I have found myself staying up until after midnight, usually until 1:00 or 2:00 am, but most dramatically until 6:00 am. I have found myself feeling sluggish the following days, but it has all been worth it. I regret nothing. But if there was something I regret, it would be my limited amount of time I can study this most marvelous of all television programs.

So, in a sense, Big Brother is like my girlfriend. It takes up all my time and deprives me of sleep, yet leaves me satisfied and yearning for me. Another perk of my love for this show is that Big Brother doesn't require me to spend any money. I am free from the pressures of being spontaneous and surprising it with unexpected bouquets of flowers or cheesy love notes.  Oh, and it always puts out . . . in the form of high-quality entertainment, that is.

24 September 2011

PORN REVIEWS

As I was rushing to catch my bus the other day, I looked down and saw a page from a newspaper all by its lonesome just laying on the sidewalk. I would have stepped right over it and gone on my way without a second thought, but something caught my attention. The big, bold title at the top of the page declaring -- "PORN REVIEWS" -- to be exact.

Porn Reviews? Do those things deserve being reviewed? Apparently, some people think they do.

Terrified at the potential of what could be said in such reviews, yet intrigued by the preposterous nature of it, I snatched up the paper, folded it, and put it in my cargo pocket for safe keeping. To be honest, I immediately thought this would give me something funny to blog about. Do you see, faithful readers, of how I am always looking out for you? I bet you, too, were unaware of such things as PORN REVIEWS. We shall live in darkness no longer!

There were three reviews : Supergirl XXX, The Sweetest Kiss, and Office Encounters.

I honestly had no idea what such a review would say. I imagined something along the lines of " . . . uh . . . yeah . . . sex . . . so hot . . ." I was wrong. While the reviews were not intelligent by any means, they were at least constructed with complete sentences. That is so much more credit than I would have given those perverts.

The biggest thing that struck me odd was that the reviewer complained about the lack of plotting and dialogue in The Sweetest Kiss and Office Encounters. As we all know, pornographic films are known for high quality dialogue and plotting. I can understand his disappointment. What?! It's a porno! What did the pervert expect? These movies are the lowest form of film and are aimed at doing one, single, disgusting, degrading, sickening thing. I'm sorry, porno review man, if you expected Office Encounters to have a woven web of plot arcs. I am equally sorry if you had been misled into purchasing The Sweetest Kiss because you thought it would be filled with witty, thought-provoking dialogue. I could see how you could have been misled by the classy titles and beautiful cover art on the DVD cases. You've been victimized! Do something about this! You go write an angry letter to Wicked Productions and Digital Sin Productions and let them know how short they have fallen of your high standards of erotic film!

Extreme Comixx, on the other and, which produced Supergirl XXX (directed by Sinister X and starring Sunny Lane and Buck Fuddy) is a much more credible film production company, that is if you can "see past the absurdity of a super suit with a super convenient fly." After all, it was "shot entirely in HD with intense close ups" and "could almost be mistaken for an instructional video" because of the "impressive displays of skills all around." The reviewer was very impressed with this "Collector's Edition 2 Disc Set [which] boasts over 8 hours of porn parody."

I will store these tidbits of information away for later use . . . when I want to feel violated or have a sudden desire to vomit.

21 September 2011

The Trouble with Time Capsules

Isn't it about time that I actually wrote something about my graduate career? For those of you who have been waiting for such scholarly content, your time for satisfaction has finally arrived!

One of my classes is titled : Book Publishing Overview. I love it. Or, rather, I loved the first two weeks of it. Things are starting to get a little hectic, and it's only three weeks into the semester.

For this class, we have one huge project that we will be working on during the entire semester. Essentially, we will be creating a book and going through all of the necessary steps to get it published (theoretically, of course). This entails : writing a summary of the book, writing a three to five page discussion of the book's content and rationale, creating a description of the intended audience, finding an author for the book and writing an author biography, creating an annotated table of contents of the book, and charting comparable and competing books in the past and present marketplace. Oh, but all that is just the stuff that's due within the next two weeks! The list goes on and on from everything to figuring out the costs and revenue, creating sample pages, determining specific production qualifications, creating the cover, laying out a publishing schedule, designing a marketing plan . . . it just doesn't stop.

Luckily, I am in a group of very dedicated, intelligent people. I know I can rely on them to get their work done and to do it well. Unfortunately, we see things a little differently. We have hit an early snag in our project -- figuring out what the book is going to be about.

Last week, we were given a list of vague topics. My group chose -- Time Capsules.

My initial reaction was to create a humor book -- something along the lines of what the time capsules of iconic families/individuals would include. For example, The Addams family would put Thing into their time capsule (which would be shaped like a coffin) and Marilyn Monroe would put in a used condom from one of her liaisons with JFK. The entire book would be illustrated, showing the famous family/individual and the items inside of their time capsules. I imagine satire and snide comments galore. I imagine hilarity abound. I did not, however, imagine the hesitation of my groupies.

While my groupies were intrigued by the concept, they were not sold. They were worried about marketability and such. Who would buy this book? Well, I answered, the same people who buy other humor books. How many of these could we actually sell? I responded that none of these books were best sellers, but we could still probably do pretty well.

What my groupies envisioned was a how-to book geared towards families with children.

My only problems with that idea is that A) It's so much more boring than my idea, and B) I don't know what else we would put in the book other than something along the lines of "Find a box. Put in stuff that's important to you. Now, bury it." What else is there to say about how to make a time capsule? Don't ask me.

We have yet to settle on either topic. For now, we are each brainstorming concrete ideas of what the content for either book would include. The most important thing we can decide is what direction we will be going with this project. I really hope my fun, funnest, funnerest idea pulls through, but it might be a hard sell. I have to come up with a lot of great, hilarious ideas to include in this humor book and hope I can convince my groupies of the potential greatness inherent in my idea.

I have a lot or work to do.

20 September 2011

The Mysterious Basement Unit

In the Boston area, it seems that most apartments were originally houses that are now cut up and divided into several units. The building in which I live is no exception. The original house has been cut into three apartment units - the basement, the main floor, and the upper two floors.

I live in the apartment in the upper two floors.

If one was to enter the back door of the house, one would step into a hallway that leads to all three apartment units. If one would turn right and go up the stairs, one would enter my apartment. If one was to go forward, once would enter the ground floor unit. And if one was to move down the hall and then down the stairs into the basement, one would enter the laundry room and be able to access the basement apartment. All of these apartments have lockable doors to prohibit anyone from just walking in through the back.

As for the basement unit, it does not take up the entire basement. A large portion of it is the "laundry room" . . . which is really just one washer and one dryer in a large, unfinished room that doubles as storage for all three units.

I have yet to meet the people living in either of the other two units. My roommates have met the people who live on the main floor. They are a married gay couple and I have been told that they are very nice. The basement tenants, however, are a mystery to all.

The other day, I was in the basement doing my laundry when I heard strange noises coming from the basement apartment unit. It sounded like something you would hear in an insane asylum. It was a groaning or a grunting or some strange combination. Whatever it was, it was creepy.

Another day, I heard a baby crying for about five seconds. Then it stopped and all was silent.

And then I realized that we never lock the door that leads to the back stairwell, which leads to the laundry room, which is connected to the basement unit whose tenants we have never met and from whence these strange noises have been coming.

How comforting.

But as none of us has been butchered in our beds, I think we'll be safe. Besides, I kind of like the danger. I'll just sleep with a baseball bat in my bed.

15 September 2011

Search Results

Blogger, the website that powers this blog, is awesome. It tracks certain statistics and conveniently displays them for me on my administrator page. One statistic they track is how people come across my blog. They divide this into referring sites, such as Facebook (find and like me on Facebook if you haven't already. And don't feel shy about referring me to your friends), and Google search results. The statistics about these search results have been very entertaining. They tell me how often someone has found my blog due to specific search results. For example, I know that 43 different people have found my blog by typing in "my worthless degree" in the Google search bar and clicking on the link that referred my blog. But that is the least interesting search result by which people have come across My Worthless Degree.

Here are some of my favorites (my reactions) and the corresponding blog entries (they are links, so feel free to click and read if you so desire) :

- cleavage baby (I don't even want to know) Thank You, Horrid Cleavage Baby
- "most of the balloons" (Is someone in clown school writing a historical report on balloons? The use of balloons as renewable energy sources? A suspected balloon uprising? I didn't realize clown school was so legitimately academic.) The 3 Stages of a Balloon's Life
- all aboard the ass train (Huh. I guess that phrase isn't as original as I thought.) All Aboard the Ass Train
- beard net sale (That's just silly. Who needs that many beard nets?) Choking Velociraptors, Beard Nets, and Phantom Limb -- Oh, My!
- how to help a diabetic druggie (Shoot 'em in the face.) Diabetic or Druggie?
- pics of sexy lesbians dressed as fairies (Nerds! What? They searched for this between quests on World of Warcraft?) Glitter Dragons and Sexy (Sometimes Lesbian) Fairies
- nostril man (I like the images this creates in my mind.) Justin Bieber's Angry Twin, Hairy Nostril Man, and The Completely Inappropriate Guy
- velociraptors eating ice-cream (What flavor or ice-cream. Terrified human and caramel swirl?) Choking Velociraptors, Beard Nets, and Phantom Limb -- Oh, My!
- bulliten board worm template (What does that even mean?) possibly Co-Worker Freak Show
- t-rex hates pushups (I do, too. Maybe if a T-rex is ever trying to eat me, I can distract him by bringing up our mutual dislike of pushups.) Co-Worker Freak Show
- facts about bragging (Fact #1 : Bragging is a good way to make people hate you.) Shameful Facts VS Bragging Rights
- does biglots sell microwaves (I've never been to a Big Lots and I'm okay with that.) possibly Ancient Loans

There was also a "referring site" that concerned me. It was http://pornfreetube.ru/. I feel so cheap and violated.

13 September 2011

When Pigeons Attack

I have spent some time around the Boston Common (a large park in the heart of downtown Boston) lately, and boy are there a lot of pigeons. I suppose every large city has a problem with them, but I've never lived in a big city before, so these everyday encounters with these winged rats are new to me.

Tonight, I would like to share two stories involving pigeons.

Pigeon Story #1 :

I was walking along, minding my own business when I heard a scream. I turned and saw a woman on her cellphone sitting in the Boston Common as a large number of pigeons darted past her on either side, most of them flying very closely. They weren't actually attacking her, but with the way she screamed, you might have thought they were. She covered her head and ducked down low and turned to look as the frenzied birds flew overhead. I saw a dropping fall. Sadly, it didn't hit the girl.

Pigeon Story #2 :

The other day, I bought myself some baked goods--a cherry cupcake with a lot of frosting and a blueberry muffin, to be exact. The weather was pleasant, and I decided to leave the confines of the library and enjoy my unhealthy snack in the Boston Common. I sat on a low retaining wall, not too far from a woman who was enjoying McDonald's french fries and also not very far from about seventy-five pigeons hopping around in the grass behind me.

The french fry-eating woman made the mistake of throwing a french fry into the grass for the pigeons to enjoy. They attacked, piling over each other and tearing at it with their beaks until it had completely disappeared. Then they noticed the remainder of the woman's fries poured out onto a napkin in her lap. A few of the pigeons stupidly hopped over and tried to get at her fries. The woman was not pleased. She started screaming at the pigeons "LEAVE ME ALONE! GO! LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Most of them obeyed and abandoned their fry hijacking, but a few of them retreated only to double back to make a second attempt. The woman began screaming as loud as she could, this time I think it was in another language--either French or Wino--and thrashed her arms about to defend her precious fried potato sticks, making a complete spectacle of herself.

I felt horrible. Not for her, but because I didn't have my camera on me.

12 September 2011

Cheap Chicken

I am a fan of chicken. Not chickens, as in the animals--but chicken, as in the meat. It is oh, so tastey and can be prepared in many delicious ways. Chicken alfredo . . . chicken enchiladas . . . chicken cordon bleu . . . grilled chicken breasts . . .  . . . Shake and Bake . . . the list joyously goes on and on!

One of the toughest things that I had to deal with after moving to the Boston area was the increase in the price of food. Where I was from, boneless chicken breasts were easily found at under $2.00/pound. Here, the closest grocery store was selling their boneless chicken breasts at $5.00/pound! I almost fainted in the aisle!

I grumbled my way away from the outrageously priced poultry and sought out other stores with more moderate chicken prices. The only other place I found was an Asian market which was selling their boneless chicken breasts at the low, low price of $2.49/pound. The sad thing was that I couldn't be sure if it was safe to eat or not. Using the cleanliness of the store and the visual quality of the packaging of the meat, I decided it would be in my best interest to pass.

I had resigned to the fact that I might never be able to each meat in this expensive town. A few days after I allowed myself to sink to this pit of despair, I saw a grocery ad. Boneless chicken breasts for $1.99/pound?! I rearranged my schedule and went to the store as soon as I possibly could and bought 13 pounds of that discounted goodness. I would have gotten more if I didn't share a freezer with four other grown men. 13 pounds should last me a few weeks. I will have to use it sparingly and keep my eye on those ads with an unfailing hope that meat will once again fit into my meager, graduate student budget.

But for now, I will rejoice. I bought Hot N Spicy Shake and Bake the other day and I know how to use it.

07 September 2011

My Bitch

My graduate career has officially begun, and, unsurprisingly, my anxiety level has skyrocketed. The first week of classes has come and gone for me, and I am already freaking out.

Can I really do this whole graduate school thing? Will I have enough time to do all of my homework? Will I be smart enough? Will I be smart enough to develop professional connections that will benefit me in finding a career? What internships should I try to get? Am I ruining my life?

Am I being overdramatic? Not really. Graduate school has been a dream of mine for a long time and I am in a program that offers me everything I could possibly want--in terms of study, practical experience, and opportunities to make professional connections. I need to take this seriously. I just think these first couple of weeks will be difficult until I develop and settle into a routine. I like routines. They help me know what to expect, and if I know what to expect, I can plan for it weeks in advance and rock its world.

It also doesn't help that I don't know this city, haven't developed many strong friendships with anyone, haven't found a gym I like, am not used to the higher price of food (meat especially--boneless chicken breasts for $5.99/pound?! Are you kidding me?!), don't have a job and have this horrible feeling of dread regarding my finances, have been out of school for a year, and no longer have a car. Oh, I almost forgot to mention that I'm a spaz. That sure doesn't help.

In the long run, I know I'll be fine. I think it's healthy to freak out at the beginning of one's graduate career, to just get it all out and then move on. And now that that's out of the way, I'm ready to make this program my bitch.

06 September 2011

Summer Goal Evaluation

It is a sad day when summer ends. Summer, for me, always means fun, and as I venture out into the new school year (and graduate career), I must look back and reflect upon my summer.

I had set a series of summer goals to complete. Let's see how I did.

*

1) Complete and begin editing a rough draft of "When Grandad Came Back" -- I meant for this to be a short story, but I should have known better. It's over 40 pages and has no end in sight. I could have finsihed a draft if I hadn't been so lazy, but, eh. It was summer.

2) Read Dracula by Bram Stoker -- X -- (see Things You Should Know About Dracula)

3) Read Cloud Atlas by David Mitchell -- X -- This book is amazing. If you don't know who David Mitchell is, you should hang your head in shame. All I really need to say is "literary multiple-orgasm".

4) Beat The Legend of Zelda : Twilight Princess -- X

5) Beat Paper Mario : The Thousand Year Door -- This is one long, freaking game. I'm 3/7ths done.

6) Beat Legend of Legaia -- I'm really not ashamed that I didn't accomplish my video gaming summer goals. I'm actually kind of proud of that.

7) Make a painting -- X -- (see My "Painting")

8) Make a wall hanging of a woman's torso -- X -- (see Frida)
9) Bike 3 times a week with increasing milages (weather permitting) in addition to going to the gym 3 times a week -- X -- I could have biked a little bit more, but I think I did really good.

10) Go to ValleyFair -- X -- (see The Sunscreen/Eyeball Incident)

11) Finish making my Seether shirt -- X -- Sadly, I didn't like how it turned out, and I'm not going to post a picture of my failure. Let's just forget this ever happened.

12) Make one meal I've never cooked before each week -- X -- I actually missed cooking one week, but I cooked two new meals at the begining of the summer, so I think it evens itself out and I can consider this goal accomplished (see Sushi = Difficult).

13) Watch two movies a week -- FAIL? -- I am actually not sure about this goal. I was at least really close. The movies I watched included, but may not be limited to, The Ring, The Devil's Playground, Unstoppable, True Grit, Mission Impossible III, War of the Worlds, X-men : First Class, Rise of the Planet of the Apes, and Momento.

14) Go out and do more photography -- X -- (see The People of Central Park, Lost in a Cemetary, Summer Smut, Demolition Derbies are Awesome, and The Unintentionally Scary Museum)

15) Hunt for a new job -- X -- This goal was actually abandoned (see About This Whole Job Thing)

*

I think 10 out of 14 is pretty good, especially when the unaccomplished goals involve playing video games and watching movies. Not included in this list of goals was spending a whole week with my BFF, my new TV addiction AKA Big Brother, moving to Boston, making new friends and developing a social life, and going to New York City for a weekend (among other things). It has been a great summer and I did a lot of fun things. So, for now, I bid thee farewell, summer. You will be in my thoughts, heart, and dreams until we meet again.

04 September 2011

The People of Central Park

It's a crazy life when someone asks you if you want to go on an impromptu weekend visit to New York City and you can say "yes". I've only been to The Big Apple once and was very excited to go back to that amazing metropolitan wonderland.

We did a lot of things while in New York, but favorite was walking around Central Park. I spent about two hours just roaming around aimlessly, and I am very thankful that I did. The park is enormous and has all kinds of hidden treasures waiting to be stumbled upon. It has everything from a castle to an ancient obelisk to baseball diamonds and even a zoo, but we musn't forget the true stars of Central Park--the people.





I am no student of classical music, but these musicians were awesome. They chose the perfect place to play. The acoustics were amazing.









You got to love the performers. I have an urge to try and do something ridiculous in Central Park to see how much money I can get. I just have to think of something totally outrageous.












I was hoping she would climb all the way to the top of the arch. She didn't. What a loser. I hope her mother punished her laziness.









The park was crawling with adorable children. I don't think these children knew each other, but the girl wanted to go to the top of the rocks with the boy but the boy said it wasn't safe. They were so matter-of-factly in their discussion.







At one point, I heard music. I zombie walked towards it--muuuuuusssic--and found this! A skating/dancing club! These people get together in central park on a regular basis, block off an area, and then skate/dance to house music for several hours. This guy was ridiculous. He was working his shoulders like nobody's business.








The most impressive skater/dancer was this massively ripped man who had the balancing powers of a classicaly-trained 18th-century woman.










Some other people in the group included a man with some kind of bouncy shoes (in the background) and a woman who was just shaking her hips and waving around a stick. Here she looks like she's screaming. I think she got a splinter. There was also a man (not pictured) who winked at me. That was when I decided to leave.









And even though I did not find him/her, I did find evidence of The Very Hungry Caterpillar having recently been in Central Park. This was the closest to seeing a celebrity that I came.




There are two others I must mention in this blog. The first was actually a group of elderly people who were kicking around a soccer ball. I didn't take a picture of them because I was so shocked that all I could do was watch and pray that they didn't hurt themselves. The second was a woman who wasn't in central park. I was struggling my way through the overwhelming crowds and stood next to a woman pushing a stroller. She was on her cellphone and when we started to cross the street, she said "What makes you think I'm getting liposuction?"

Ah, what a weekend. If you scroll further down, you may enjoy a few other non-people-related pictures.




01 September 2011

The Ups and Downs of Orientation

DOWN : Getting up at 6:00 am

UP : Breakfast burrito

DOWN : The trip to campus -- The bus was late -- The T (Boston's subway system) was supposed to be rerouted, but then the reroute was cancelled--which is a good thing, but also a bad thing since it was confusing -- I realized I forgot to figure out which subway stop I need to get off at -- I got off at the wrong stop -- When I arrived at the place where the orientation e-mail told me to be, the lights were off, the door was locked, and it was clearly the wrong location.

UP : I wasn't the only ill-informed fool. Two other new graduate students were in the same boat. One of them had a smart phone and was able to find the real location of the opening meeting for the orientation and we arrived just in time.

DOWN : Sitting through countless orientation speakers

UP : Informative campus tour

DOWN : Taking the campus tour and having to wade through droves and droves of freshmen

UP : Free lunch with interesting people

DOWN : The painstaking task of opening a new bank account

UP : FIRE ALARM (see picture on the right)

DOWN : No actual fire

UP : More mingling and free food

DOWN : I had to leave the mixer before they handed out the raffle prizes

UP : Informative session about becoming involved in a graduate literary magazine

DOWN : I look like I have Down's Syndrome in my college photo ID

Overall, I would say that the UP outweighed the DOWN in a big way. I am so excited for my classes and the things I will learn, internships, readings, becoming involved in activities and organizations, and countless other things. That said, my excitement has not coaxed me into rushing summer on its way out. I want it to stick around for as long as possible. The school year, as amazing as it will be, will come with all of its fun and stress and overwhelming responsibilities soon enough.