Today, I saw a man sitting down and leaning against the wall of a building. He was smoking and had a lidded coffee cup sitting next to him.
I Should've . . . set some change on top of his coffee cup lid as if he was begging, even though he clearly was not, patted him on the head, and said "Cheer up, buddy. Times will get better" and then walked away.
My Worthless Degree was originally dedicated to writing about my deadend jobs. But being an unemployed graduate student, I have decided to take a different approach until I do get another job--one that's hopefully not worthless. This segment is called the "I Should've". Don't worry, you can still look back (thanks to handy tags located on the right side of the page) on my past deadend experiences.
08 November 2011
05 November 2011
(#6) The "Balloon Jerks" I Should've
Last night, I was waiting at a bus stop. It was late, closing in on midnight, so there was goodly number of people walking around. Across the road, a group of balloons was tied to the pole. I have no idea why they were there.
A group of five men walked by, saw the balloons, began to break the strings tying the balloons to the pole, and released the multi-colored helium-filled sacks of plastic into the night air.
I Should've . . . ran over to them just as the last balloons floated away, crying, and waving my arms and stomping my feet and jumping around like an angry toddler, screaming "Those are my balloons! Those are my balloons! Why did you do that?!"
A group of five men walked by, saw the balloons, began to break the strings tying the balloons to the pole, and released the multi-colored helium-filled sacks of plastic into the night air.
I Should've . . . ran over to them just as the last balloons floated away, crying, and waving my arms and stomping my feet and jumping around like an angry toddler, screaming "Those are my balloons! Those are my balloons! Why did you do that?!"
02 November 2011
(#5) The "Donut Crusher" I Should've . . .
You may not be able to tell by just looking at me, but I go to the gym three times a week to lift weights. I am, in fact, so eco-friendly and health conscious that I even bike there and back (this is in no way explained by the fact that I do not currently own a car).
On my way to and from the gym, I cut through the parking lot of a Dunkin Donuts. I know you're not suppose to do that, but it saves me a whole three seconds . . . some of the time. There are times when I get held up in that oh, so busy parking lot. I often find myself having to slow down or even stop because cars are backing out of spots or are pulling into the lot and almost hitting me or because people are oblivious to the fact that they have just stepped out and began walking in front of me. It's like they're zombies and all they can think about is their precious coffee and donuts. It frustrates me.
Rather than being outwardly nice by not doing anything about this, I should . . . swoop around the annoying people who are walking to their cars, grab the coffee of one, throw it into the open door of someone else's vehicle, and then nab the donut of another person (preferably just as they are about to take their first bite), crush it in my hands, let the pieces fall to the filthy concrete, and just keep biking.
I would love to do this every morning.
On my way to and from the gym, I cut through the parking lot of a Dunkin Donuts. I know you're not suppose to do that, but it saves me a whole three seconds . . . some of the time. There are times when I get held up in that oh, so busy parking lot. I often find myself having to slow down or even stop because cars are backing out of spots or are pulling into the lot and almost hitting me or because people are oblivious to the fact that they have just stepped out and began walking in front of me. It's like they're zombies and all they can think about is their precious coffee and donuts. It frustrates me.
Rather than being outwardly nice by not doing anything about this, I should . . . swoop around the annoying people who are walking to their cars, grab the coffee of one, throw it into the open door of someone else's vehicle, and then nab the donut of another person (preferably just as they are about to take their first bite), crush it in my hands, let the pieces fall to the filthy concrete, and just keep biking.
I would love to do this every morning.
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